Today was bittersweet.
Today was the NYC Marathon -- and I was supposed to be running.
I have never really been the athletic type; I played field hockey at boarding school and it was probably the only time my family has ever seen me sweat (well, other than when I'm outlet shopping). Nonetheless, I decided to challenge myself to run the marathon with my work's charity team. I watched the race in '08 - if people with prosthetic legs could run it and if a blind man holding on a string attached to his friend could run it, then I could finish it.
BUT the big guy had another plan. I have something called genu recurvatum where my knees naturally hyperextend. I was approaching the sixth mile of a Saturday run when my knee completely gave way. I'm pretty sure my (lack of) leg muscles weren't used to the demand and my legs had been hyperextending for a mile or two. After my knee gave out I could barely walk. I hobbled at snail-speed and had to push myself up and down the subway stairs by the disgusting handrails I usually refuse to touch. (sidenote: I will never be angry at the slow-walkers again). I irritated the tendons on the inside of my knee and my doctor told me I either needed a cortisone shot or I couldn't run for six weeks. I asked for the shot - annnnd he refused to give it to me. It had to do with something about me being too young and not competing in the Superbowl the following day; I stopped listening when reality kicked in.
I rested, iced, compressed, elevated and repeated.
And repeated again.
To no immediate avail.
After a good amount of pouting and denial, I deferred my entry to next year. One of the hardest lessons to learn in life is realizing that things are out of your control. We set out and make plans for a week, a month, a year and even a lifetime and more often then not things happen in ways we don't ever imagine - let alone plan. So, yes, today was bittersweet. I loved watching the enthusiasm at mile 20 and cheering for my co-workers and friends. I loved high-fiving strangers and seeing children cheer on their parents with colorful posters. I loved the motivation that lifted my spirits for next year and with a tear that filled my eye (that I completely blame on the cold weather), I fell in love with this city all over again.
until next time (and until next year, mister marathon),